People after the porn ban have started depending upon online dating for satisfaction and erotica. And with all the categories it’s like a supermarket where you visit once and try to shop as much stock as you can which last approximately for a month.
There are sales where you find ugly and creepy people, then you have the consistent member offers which upgrade you to the outlet with handsome and less hairy guys.
We saw the advent of online dating with the desperation of single people to not take the heavenly advice of being single forever and go and hunt their soulmate.
And even though we all know that we await for our prince charming or queen of our dreams… but that means you kiss one frog and not sleep with the entire pond, which most of us do as we hinge ourselves with a bucket of popcorn and fixate our faith over faceless profiles.
Simple Do’s and Don’ts
- Start by creating a profile: For people who do not understand what a profile is, it is a medium through which you upload your most deceptive picture which covers your flaws and pimples and makes your flabs look like abs.
- Start a conversation: We know you want to make love but a ‘Hi’ or a ‘Hello’ is a good start rather than ‘I love you’. Wait for a reply! Do not block someone because he did not reply to you in 0.0000001 second after your Hi, its an online portal where Indian service providers provide service which is as fast the decision making of supreme court.
- LeArN tO TyPe: This kind of typing is not only creepy but shows you are no where close to being called a boy-friend or girl-friend. Seriously, Rahul Gandhi’s speeches are smoother than the way some of us type on social media apps.
- Choosing a location to meet up: Vile parle East, or Lajpat nagar is not a place for going out on a date. Neither is your bedroom or the tree house behind your college. Why do you want 60 year old people to enjoy pay-per-view?
- Age range: Being non-judgemental and dating people as old as the Mona Lisa are two different things. You must find people who are of your age, who share the same mentality and have sane friends not friends who attend grandma tea parties.
After this I would warn you all out there that the chance of not having a life partner or a date through these portals is more than the chance of falling in one of the potholes in Mumbai.
We can see an increase in the number of options of dating apps to log into and swipe right. And what they all say is not what they all deliver.
Tinder, Grindr, Scruff, Woo, Truly madly are just a few of those apps which have entirely changed the definition of dating. Apps are like fast moving Mumbai locals wherein if you do not like one station never mind there are always the others and the next one to jump off at.
And the funny conversation always exists.
But there is an underlying truth, which most of us fail to understand about these apps. The objective for the creation of this apps were as genuine as the interests of Mr Arvind Kejriwal in making India a less corrupt place. It just didn’t turn out as it was supposed to because…. well some stupid souls with messed up lives diverted the objective and forced people to think twice before downloading these apps and enter the barter of emotions which goes on.
And honestly blind dates aren’t so much fun. The description which people put up on their profiles is so fake and unreal. These apps are also very emotionally draining and time consuming in fact more than watching ‘Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi’.
In the end I would warn you from into indulging in these apps because your picture of a perfect 5 days date would turn into a realistic picture of friends with benefits when you embark on this weird canny adventure of making profiles on dating apps.
And if you want to pass your time and just make friends who think alike and share the same community go ahead! But I guess we already have all sorts of crazy whacky freinds in our lives and replacing them with a creep from the app is so not the way to punish them for stealing your tiffin box in 6th grade.
Working out the permutations and combinations of you failing in your exams and finding creepy people is quite the same on these apps.
So stick around life and you will definitely get someone when you have to! Don’t go hunting specially on woo ( it’s a terrible replica of tinder for India).